A “friendly” public service announcement

STOP SENDING ME FUCKING TEXT MESSAGES.  My phone bill looks like the goatse-man thanks to the 29739274 texts you people keep sending me.  If your 27 interspersed thoughts can be expressed via ONE phonecall that could take maybe five minutes, JUST FUCKING CALL ME INSTEAD.

All the time I’ve spent fingering my keypad could’ve been better spent fingering pink tacos but NO, you ungrateful bastards had other plans.  -____-

Just because YOU have free text-messaging doesn’t mean everyone else has it by default.

Cliffs: next time just give me a call or message me via facebook.

Thank you.

We must check the castle tower to make sure no vampire have gotten into our…home base…

So what is there for me to do at 0142 EST?

Not Ben Gibbard-approved but who cares?

Brian’s Question Corner—Part 01 (vol. Ramona)

I finally found a corny name for that feature where people can submit questions to me. Unfortunately, I couldn’t sneak in an innuendo but if you girls treat me right, I will find a way to sneak into YOUR endo…

Yeah, I did…

Anyway, the q+a (or rather, Q + EYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY) after the jump.

This quiz result will make you touch yourself at night

OMG Brian takes a quiz! And the answers are actually not gratuitously profane!

The greatest story ever told? Sure

Time to stroke my ego as if it were an organic obelisk measuring between five to ten inches…

Brian whips out a new feature that may leave a bruise on your face.

So my friend Allison and I discussed doing this thing where we interview each other and post it on our respective blogs.  We both figured it would be a way to introduce ourselves to our readers.

The results?  One word: superb.

「脳味噌! 常に震わせて/荒々と運命にそむく/もういっそ! 俺に生まれたなら/君をぶっ生き返す!

no mi so! tsuneni furuwasete
ara ara to unmei ni somuku
mou isso! ore ni umareta nara
kimi wo “Buiikikaesu!!”

Yes, these lyrics from Maximum the Hormone’s “Buikikaesu” have nothing to do with what I am about to write. (HINT: It’s about the movie “Beowulf!”)

So people in New York become stupider once it gets more cloudy and drizzly

So much for hoping I would be in a happier mood today…

So why is it that I like movies no one gives a shit about?

I guess I’m a nerd for being pumped up about “Beowulf” (Angelina Jolie looks serios even if she is like 90% CGI) but why is it that no one else gives a fuck?

This survey is a quickie just like your mother (lol simulpost from myspace)

1. What was going through your mind during a saw 4
DIDN’T SEE SAW 4 LOL

2. How did you do on the last test you took?
i took a quiz…117 baby : image of an emoticon PUTTING THE CIGAR IN ITS MOUTH ::

3. What is your ringtone for when people text you?
it’s just a standard beep…i can’t change it (how homo is that)

4. What show did you last watch?
probably the islanders game last night

5. Whose your favorite parent? mom or dad
father

6. What foods make you sick?
ethnic shit

7. Do you get shy around the guy/girl you like?
i do/did

8. Do you remember what you were doing a year ago?
no

9. Do you still have feelings for your ex?
NO EX TO HAVE FEELINGS FOR LOL

10. Name one Shoe Brand Model You Like. ” Ex Jordan 11/Nike “
Nike baby